翻译资格考试

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2020年一笔英译汉审校

来源 :FengTran峰翻 2020-11-23

  On Sept. 3, 1939, after Britain declared war on Germany, George VI addressed millions of people around the world in a live radio broadcast. It was a somber, stirring call to patriotism and fortitude, to courage and resilience, and it was one of the best speeches he had ever made.

  第 一段的错误在于George VI(乔治六世),而非乔治四世,罗马数字IV(四)和VI(六)确实容易混淆。我认为第二段中的Edward VIII(爱德华八世)有助于理解VI,因为VIII(八)比VI(六)多II(二)。

  He had had to struggle so hard to get there. The terrifying march to war, along with the trauma of taking over the throne after the unprecedented abdication of his popular older brother, Edward VIII, had brought back the debilitating stutter that had plagued the king since childhood. The long silences on the radio were not a rhetorical device but a verbal crutch.

  第二段没找出错误,感觉debilitating stutter翻译得不太准确。

  That he managed at all was a tribute to the man who stood beside him as he spoke, an uncredentialled, unorthodox speech therapist from Australia named Lionel Logue. “The King’s Speech,” which opens on Nov. 24, tells the story of the unlikely friendship between the two men and describes how Logue helped the king find his voice and his confidence.

  第三段的错误在于unlikely friendship,翻译成“不可能的友谊”不恰当,我改成了“让人意想不到的友谊”。

  注:交流讨论,仅供参考,欢迎补充

  “It was a perfect storm of catastrophe,” said Colin Firth, whose nuanced portrayal of George has generated a huge pre-Oscar stir. “Having a stammer causes tremendous suffering, and just a few years earlier he would have been bailed out by having his remarks recorded and edited. But he was required to speak on this new device, live radio. And to compound all that you have a war looming, where his only function is his voice, to speak to the people, and he can’t speak.”

  第四段的错误在于would have been bailed out,这里是虚拟语气,意为“本能够摆脱困境”,试题的译文中未体现出来。

  The movie opens before George (then called Prince Albert, or Bertie) becomes king, during a scene in which he is trying to address an expectant crowd at Wembley Stadium. Mr. Firth’s voice flails. He swallows his words, trips over them, and spits them partially out, lapsing into long, panicked silences. It is almost physically painful to watch.

  第五段我也没找出错误,倒数第二句有很多动词,感觉试题译文有漏译。

  George’s wife, played by Helena Bonham Carter, convinces him to seek help from Logue (Geoffrey Rush). Logue’s eccentric methods include insisting that he and Bertie address each other by their first names, making Bertie sing and impertinently asking him about his lonely childhood and his relationship with his chilly family. Gradually the future king opens up, his voice relaxing along with his clenched-up spirit.

  第六段的错误在于his relationship with his chilly family,不是“他与家人的冷漠关系”,而是“他与冷漠家人的关系”。

  “It’s Logue’s way of trying to help him at a time when convention does not allow psychoanalysis for a person like that,” Mr. Firth said. “Logue is one of the early generation who believed that getting to the heart of a problem psychologically could help with a cure.”

  第七段的错误在于convention,试题翻译为“政府”,应该是“按照习俗、根据惯例”。

  George VI remained a friend of Mr. Logue for the rest of their lives. (The king died in 1952; Logue died the following year.) The king sought his help before important speaking engagements and, in 1937 made him a member of the Royal Victorian Order, which recognizes personal service to the sovereign.

  第八段的错误在于sovereign,这里不是“主权”,而是“国王”。

  The king never fully got over his stutter, and Mr. Hooper said it would have been wrong to give the film a classic Hollywood ending, in which he is cured and lives happily ever after.

  第九段的错误在于it would have been wrong,还是虚拟语气,试题译文处理不当。

  When he went back and listened to archival recordings, Mr. Hooper said, “it was clear that the king was still coping with his stammer, and that this was not about a man who was cured. It was about a man who had learned how to cope.”

  第十段的错误在于about a man who was cured,意为“治好口吃”,而非“接受治疗”

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